My Freedom Kit: How I deal with Depression

My daily routine to cope up with my depression ( ಠ◡ಠ )

Note: This is a subjective article, I just want to share my experience on how I deal with my depression. And also, I’m not clinically treated or diagnosed of depression, I just assessed it myself, (I'm no doctor I know) because you see counselling and mental health doctor fees here in the Philippines are really expensive. So bear with me, I just want to share this because it somehow helped me and still is—that’s why I’m still here. <3
Hopefully, you or someone out there will benefit from this. Thanks for being here! (☞ﾟ∀ﾟ)☞

Let me put this into two parts: internally & externally. Think of it as baking, without the right amount of ingredients and the exact heat needed, our cake will be either burned or bland. It’s about balance you see, of the outside and of within.

No matter what religion and spiritual beliefs we are in, we can all pray or meditate. This one helped, helps and still helping me right now. It’s not really about silencing our mind, rather, it is a way of being in the present, in meditation it is like knowing what’s in our mind, what’s within. What are we feeling? And why are we feeling like this? It’s like getting to know an old friend within us, which we tend to forget exists because we are too full of what we see outside. Moreover, it is also a way of talking to God, in my case, I kinda release all my stress thru it, ranting to God and being honest with Him, sometimes all it takes is just a little bit of honesty: with God and ourselves. If you want a cheat sheet about meditation, try these two videos:

Disclaimer alert: Ziva Meditation or Mindvalley is not sponsoring me or my blog, I speak based on experience, and I used (and still using) these two videos as my daily meditation guide. I’m using the Ziva/ Emily Fletcher Meditation at work and when I don’t have an ample time to meditate, while the Mindvalley/ Vishen Meditation during weekends or when I have the time.

When we start meditating, it feels as though we’re in the state of vulnerability, because honesty is digging all those graves inside us and it sometimes touches all those wounds from the past—and that’s alright, because we need to know ourselves, we need to know why we have this and that, because we cannot solve anything without knowing the problem first. And believe me, this is the most intense yet exciting part because here we find our long forgotten dreams and our purposes. This is very important because when I  am experiencing depression, the first thing it snatched is my purpose. And life without purpose is no life at all. So when the depression snake comes sneaking fill your mind and heart with that purpose that makes you alive.


The thing about knowing the problem is that we might dwell on the area of “ifs”, if only I did this and that, if only he/she was—so before the blame game starts to turned into anxiety and depression, let’s start forgiving: ask God to forgive you and ask yourself to forgive yourself then start forgiving others (it doesn’t need to be verbally). I know that forgiving is hard, so don’t force yourself, try to think of a person or something you’ve done that is easy to forgive and let go. Practice daily and soon you’ll be able to reach that master forgiver level. The thing about coping up with depression within is that it feels like cleaning our bedrooms, getting rid of those mess that are hard to let go so that we can liberate ourselves and make use of all the free space we have for lovelier stuff, emotions and experiences. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a clean room, mind and heart?

Okay, we are now forgiven. Therefore, we should accept that fact. We are cleaning our room, so there are things that needs to be fixed. Accept that it is a work in progress and don’t be too hard on yourself. Cleaning takes time, patience and perseverance. Depression isn’t cured overnight or over one meditation. We should accept the process and respect it. God is moving and so is life. What we can do is go with the flow but instead of just being drawn by the current, let’s feel the current and appreciate it. With feeling more comes knowing more.

So now that we have accepted where we are and what we are, it’s about time to ponder to where the flow will lead us. Regaining those dreams, desires and purpose. It’s about time to take that baby step, think of the things you can do to aid you in achieving that dream. I believe that we all have purposes and depression comes if we are not living that purpose. In thinking about your first step, make it practical and doable so that disappointments may be lessen.  For example, if you want to lose weight, try to do 15-30 squats a day than doing an intense hundreds every other day because that may cause stress and it may discourage you to even try.

“You are enough”

Every day, when I’m about to brush my teeth, I first look at the mirror and smile and say to myself“You are enough”—I know it is silly and not as extra as “You are amazing” and etc. But it worked, works and still working for me. Sometimes, little words like “enough” is truly ENOUGH.

Do Chores

One thing I do when I’m in the state of depression is that I do chores. You see, when I do chores I’m just in this auto-pilot setting, not thinking enough. And it gives me a “sense of fulfillment” when I’m done and that makes me smile.

Volunteer

If you want to be surrounded by positive vibrations. Try volunteering, I’m a volunteer teacher at our church and believe me, those kids add minutes to my life! And it is a way also to get a picture of other people’s reality. You’ll get to experience other peoples’ lives and that’s enriching.

Exercise

This doesn’t need to be intense, just by mere walking at the park or at the neighborhood is enough. It is just a way of moving our bodies, making use of it to the fullest. And it’s fulfilling and healthy too. And since we are now aware of our purpose (due to what we are cleaning within), we need to reach and do that with this physical body, right? So let’s take care of it, and as a Christian, I believe that this is not just the temple of the Holy Spirit but also a creation of God that need stewarding.

Do what makes you happy

Now that we are beginning to know ourselves more, we recall those things, habits and experiences that makes us happy—so let’s make use of those memories by doing those again. Going back to reading, drawing, watching movies—those things that makes you smile. Don’t deprive yourself of things that you love, because other than God, only you knows what you love, need and want. Treat yourself some loving because you’ve been through a lot and you’re still here despite everything. Hail to you oh brave one!

Me Time

At the very least try to make time for yourself. This is VERY IMPORTANT. DON’T DEPRIVE YOURSELF HONEY. But of course, we need to be responsible enough to be aware of what we are capable of and of course, of our responsibilities also. This time is for self-growth, self-reflection and self-pampering.

Say “No”

As a famous quotation states: ‘Saying No to others, means saying “Yes” to ourselves’—depends actually in the situation. This is where our moral compass will be tested. If saying “No” means you’ll be safe, productive and happy, then say “No” by all means. However, if you say “No” to progress, self-growth because you want to stay at your comfort zone, please try to reconsider.

So you may ask how in the world do I adapt these in my schedule, then here’s how:

It may look handful but believe me, you can do waaaay better. (~￣▽￣)~

And remember, we are the caregivers of our minds, souls & bodies, therefore let’s be careful on what we feed ourselves with; be it music, TV show, relations, literature or even movies. Let’s help ourselves empower the purpose, the happiness and the peace we already have within.